You can not control others………. Intellectually that makes perfect sense right? Then why is it that you keep trying?
There is a difference between trying to control or change others AND having your needs met.
The first is YOU trying to make those around you behave in a way that works for YOU in your life.
The latter is YOU asking speaking out, communicating what you need ( and most of those needs can be met by you!)
Even really simple things can drive you crazy like, having the toothpaste tube squeezed in the middle instead of having it rolled up from the bottom, a new roll of TP put on instead of just leaving the empty cardboard tube and even driving yourself crazy because your kid did not do what you asked him/her for the 100th time. ARGHHH!
Well, just think about all the stress you are causing yourself and all the energy you are wasting by getting yourself so worked up inside. But what are you to do about it……how can YOU control them or get THEM to change (so YOU can feel better)? Wow, I am just tired trying to follow that train of thought.
Well, here are two things you can do right away:
1. Tell the person HOW you FEEL about it and ASK them if they can agree to do this for you or at least meet you half way. (now I know with kids it takes a little longer – BUT believe me, even with kids it is “human nature” to follow through with doing the task or request IF you give them your reason.) Has it ever worked to just “want” to do what you are told ( maybe only for fear of repercussions?) AND all the complaining in the world will NOT work…it will just make others turn a deaf ear or not want to be around you.
2. Take a deep breath , ask yourself HOW truly important this is to you….can you relax and just let it go ( and if not WHY not?). Then let it go….It may still bother you, but if you can do this time and time again, before you know it, the more calm you are and things are getting done AND your calm energy will move around you and throughout your environment. Others will love being around you AND things WILL get done.
Lets face it …it is truly the small little things that build up that interfere with YOUR own peace of mind…..WHY are you letting that happen to you? Yes, YOU, are letting that happen to you and maybe even hindering some very loving relationships where that energy could be used for nurturing instead dismantling.
And if you really still feel you can not let go of the need to CONTROL……well how about funneling that energy to areas of your life and focus on things that are really in your control. YOU WILL feel better! I guarantee it! ( but remember the key is to do these things – shift your focus – the mind can only hold one thought or focus at a time!)
Right now YOU are in charge of:
1. Your level of honesty.
2. How many times you smile today.
3. How often you say “thank you.”
4. What you spend your money on.
5. How you act on your feelings
6. Whether or not you give someone the benefit of the doubt.
7. Whether you listen or wait to talk.
8. When you walk away from a conversation.
9. The type of food you eat.
10. How much time you spend worrying.
11. How much exercise you get.
12. How many times you swear at others in traffic.
13. How often you think about your past.
14. How many negative articles you read or news you listen to.
15. The loving attention you give to your spouse & kids when you see them.
16. How much you enjoy your kids right now.
17. Whether or not you communicate something that’s on your mind.
18. How you interpret situations.
19. How often you notice & appreciate small acts of kindness-they’re everywhere!
20. How deeply you breathe when you experience stress.
21. How many times you say “I love you.”
Food for thought isn’t it?
Just think of all the extra energy you will have when you stop trying to control and manage others and just manage yourself? Ahhh Bliss……
Can’t seem to STOP doing what is bringing you what you DON”T want in your life?
Maybe I can help you….Well in fact I KNOW I can help you.
Sometimes doesn’t it feel good to get an objective point of view…..One that can help you “see the forest for the trees” of should I say ” feel seen, heard and valued in YOUR world”?…Stop complaining - start attracting what you really want…give that all your attention, energy and focus.
You want more love….give more love (but not to someone if they are abusing you), want more money, clean up your debt and start focusing on wealth and abundance, want more time….simplify your life and focus on what YOU TRULY WANT. STOP COMPLAINING about what you don’t want…cause guess what YOU WILL JUST GET MORE OF THAT.
Don’t know what you want ? In 30 minutes with me ……YOU WILL KNOW.
Time to Discover what you Want to HAVE in your life. This is your movie…time to step into YOUR starring role!
….or you can just continue to get what you are getting now. CHOOSE something NEW TODAY.
…….and Remember “When Moms Happy….Everyone’s Happy”
the “Busy Mom Mentor”
ps. if this messages today has helped you, even in the smallest of ways, please pass it on to others who are waiting to be inspired to create what they truly want in their lives.