Archive for August, 2012

The Ultimate Time Out ~ for Busy Working Moms

What can I say…..Back To School IS the Ultimate Time OUT for most busy working moms!

This is the time that routines are established and as the leaves turn red and gold a different kind of bus-y-ness occurs. I call this “controlled” chaos. Yes you are busy again trying to cram in all the new activities and old ones but it is also a time for renewal….much more so in my opinion than January 1st.

So here are a few tips for you to get your self ready for ”the Ultimate Time Out”. If you plan and prepare for YOUR needs as the school season begins …you are much more likely to continue taking care of yourself right through the onset of the New Year.

 

1. Get the kids to bed Start now…. if the kids have been up WAY past their bedtime throughout the summer then start at least one week prior to the first day of school and gradually get them into bed 15 min earlier each night until you are at the “regular” school night bedtime. Guess What? This means you can re-establish your bedtime routine and enjoy quiet time (out) that is necessary for your self renewal .

2. Pay attention to what you are eating

As the seasons change…so do your bodies. The plethora of fresh fruits that you enjoy through the warm summer months…are also packed with sugar (a stimulant)…albeit Mother Nature sugar…still as the season turns cooler the natural desire for more warming foods will become more welcomed.Both you and your kids will feel better when you begin again to eat three good meals a day. Make time to do the planning together. And then if it works in your kitchen allow them to help…this is great bonding time for you and your kids and can be YOUR time together…thus spending less time with them at bedtime and creating more time for YOU.

3. Move YOUR Body

Do something – anything.  Plan time twice a week to share exercise with your kids. Otherwise start now to plan the classes and the time (out) just for you to take care of yourself. If you eliminate one thing every week from your schedule that does not serve your highest good (being vibrant and healthy)  then you WILL find the time to move your body in a way that is fun and invigorating for you.

4. Put your best face forward

“To look good …is to feel good , Dahling”  Treat yourself to a NEW look, get a great haircut. Find a affordable outfits that you will love to wear. Smile….you can not hold a negative thought and smile. Keep smiling…. the negative thought will atrophy and you will look good, feel good …you will smile more.

5.Laugh 

For one month….only watch shows/movies that make you laugh. You’ll automatically feel better. Stay away from negative news (magazines,papers and radio). Find the humour in everyday situations

6. Gratitude 

Every night at bedtime, take two minutes to count your blessings. Make a gratitude list. Write it down and then every night look at it and add to it often.  Help your kids create one  too.

7. Don’t be a Martyr

You don’t have to do it all alone. Ask for help from family, friends, co-workers, and organizations for help.  People love to be needed, including your kids …as long as you are not “using” them, reach out ask for what you need….and when the time comes you can reciprocate ( good role modeling for the kids and another way to feel good and take a time out for YOU).

8. Pray/Meditate/Breathe

Every single day….to round off the ULTIMATE time out ….spend time to connect with YOUR God. Whatever that is for you: Nature, music, church, sitting by the ocean, yoga…. Do something that makes you feel whole. ( if this is new to you, start with once a week and increase the frequency)….It will become a place to come home…to yourself …everyday that you won’t want to miss. (…and it will help you tremendously with the controlled chaos of your “new” year… starting right now.)

….One more thing …..you are NOT a supermom and your kids are not “superkids”  lower your expectations of yourself and your kids and YOU will find that YOU will create an ULTIMATE time out habit  that will stand the test of time. YOUR Time!

….and of course, Remember……“When Moms Happy…Everyone’s Happy”
Mona McClelland
the “Busy Mom Mentor”

ps….if you found this helpful and know of someone else who would benefit too, please pass it along…they WILL thank you.

pps….if you know that there is something “else” that you are meant to do in this world…besides being a mom AND need a little help making that happen. I am here to help and support you. In  30 minutes Discover exactly WHAT to do NEXT ~ even if you are tired, lazy,in a bad mood most of the time AND have no goals!

Play with kids – make money

If you are reading this post, I am almost sure it is because of the subject title AND I know that you are more than a little bit curious about HOW you might play with your kids and make money.

Well we both know there are several ways that you could do that, just type in google and ask “how to play with kids and make money”….but what I am talking about is HOW you can structure your busy life, work, family, spouse, finances and self care and make money too (whether it be your dream job, work from home or figuring out HOW to make your “hobby” support your desired lifestyle.)

AND the irony of it all, is in the years I have been coaching, the one thing that will stop MOST women dead in their tracks, is having an idea and then getting STUCK on the HOW. Believe me, sister, ALL you need is the WHAT (the inspired idea), hold on to it, and the HOW will present itself. …And right now you are probably saying ” oh really……HOW”?

Today I am simply going to share with you 5 steps…Tips, I guess, but if you really do these 5 steps you will create a strong foundation to start manifesting DELIBERATELY your ideal EVERYTHING.

There is nothing different about me….from any of you.  Not too long ago I was a confused, messed up, depressed, single mom. One day I decided to take stock of what gifts I already had to offer the world, what my strengths were, then I decided to ‘get help’ …I hired a coach….and from there got clear on what/who I wanted in my life.  Oh Yah…I hit some roadblocks…BUT those roadblocks were GOLD, they showed me what was stopping me from stepping up and out ( even though at times I was as nervous as Bambi standing for the first time on new wobbly legs) But guess what….I got stronger….and YOU will too!

Ok…ready to make some changes in your world?

Remember I had no special talents or advantages. Anyone can do this stuff–including YOU.

1. Get Clear on Your Purpose

Remember I said all you needed to figure out is the WHAT you want…the inspiration for your life? Want to make your dreams come true? Clarifying this purpose is the one most important thing you must do

Having a crystal clear…focused understanding
of WHAT you truly want to do or give the world allows you to make decisions quick and easy. It keeps you on track with your goal markers. It helps you avoid getting side tracked and making mistakes. And it brings you back quickly to a simple quick-reference point for staying the course, (when challenges occur).

What you truly desire must be relevant to you. Why? Because it’s the compass for your LIFE. Why should you get that new job, start a new business, lose 25 pounds?  Don’t hang out with Dream Stealers (or give them ANY of your precious time).Know that it’s okay to like WHAT you like and to pursue your own path!

2. Follow a Plan

If you want to do three errands and still get to the school in time to pick up your kids…. you plan out the quickest and most efficient route right? This way you can get it all done and be on time. Oh sure you can just hop in the car and hope you get it all done BUT if you follow your simple plan you won’t waste any time, can just follow the plan and get the tasks completed effectively.

Keep your ability to become distracted by creating a check list and follow your plan. Keep your weaknesses in check–by following a plan.

There is really a very simple way to chart any goal IF you use two strategies: Creating a deadline and being accountable.

Deadlines force you to get serious complete your tasks, and show you clearly when you are NOT staying true to your plan. Firm deadlines help to eliminate excuses, and stop you from getting caught up in BUSY- ness that has nothing to do with your desired result.

And that’s where accountability comes in. You need some way to keep yourself on track.  For me “the coach” helped a ton…and the fact that I laid some money on the line too. You know it is not that you are purposely going to lie to yourself but the memory is fallible, and it’s easy to imagine you’re getting more accomplished more than you really think you are, just because you’re “working on it.” Oh boy, am I ever good at falling into that one. A system of accountability gives you a way to track your progress.

Use these tools and you can accomplish any task you set for yourself.

3. Houseclean Your Life

Oh yah… I can hear you groan…NO MORE housecleaning…puullease!  But this type of housecleaning will GIVE you energy and space to receive what you have set out to get.

First – get rid of the people who are pulling you down and taking you away from your dreams….

OUCH – harsh right…okay you do not have to disown anyone. BUT really limit your time with these well intentioned “loved ones” who tell you that you cannot do what you WANT to do. They think they are keeping you from getting hurt or failing. Well guess what? They are not you…it is not their life…Thank them and carry on with YOUR dreams. (These would be the dream stealers I mentioned earlier). Also keep your distance from nagging, complaining, energy drainers….people AND violent drama on TV and in the news,

Make better choices of what  and who you want to share your environment with. AND guess what …when you change yourself and are true to yourself…they won’t come around you anymore AND you will not enjoy sources of “negative” entertainment that you once allowed to seep into your being….

Other housecleaning to do?….Yep, get rid of clutter, tie up loose ends, get a debt repayment program going, so you can focus on building wealth and abundance. “GET YOUR HOUSE IN ORDER”…make room for the new. “YOUR HOUSE” is your environment….as you clean it….WHAT you now want will be able to find a space to call home.

Know also that in choosing to do one thing, you’re also choosing not to do an awful lot of other things. Commit to people, actions or things only when they’re in line with Item 1 on this list–WHAT YOU WANT – for your life – your purpose.

4. Embrace Responsibility for Your Life

Oh I have been the biggest victim of circumstance in my life….OMG… but I had to let go of all that stuff…SO what!! ..”The past is the past for a reason – ITS OVER” Sounds harsh doesn’t it…yes I know….I remember finally waking up to this fact and I think for a while I became more of a victim “nobody understood me”. BUT the LOVING truth is you aren’t a victim of your childhood or your past or your circumstances–unless you choose to be. There are no excuses.

When I realized the “buck” stopped here…. I had to stop making excuses and I stopped waiting for others to help me. Instead, I started changing my life AND I sought out an invested in me AND the kind of help and resources I needed.

It didn’t always feel easy and some days I can still slide a little backwards (my latest EXCUSE…menopause – ha ha). I assure you, it DOES get easier when you get clear about your purpose and you embrace it with fierce desire. When you’re driven by that purpose of what you really want in your life and when every action you take is aligned with it, it’s easy to stay on track and receive every goal or marker you set for yourself.

5. Focus on Direct Action

Start taking Action. Lay out the first step ( if you do not know the step after that …that is okay..It will reveal itself) But, don’t let that stop you. TAKE the first step fearlessly and watch what unfolds by taking direct action puts YOU in the driver’s seat and in control of your destiny. If you are not taking charge, then you are handing someone else control of your life.

I get that there are people there to take into consideration. Your spouse, perhaps, your kids too, but I am sure that you get that there is a difference between finding your dream and taking steps to make it happen and asking permission. You are a grown, powerful, vibrant woman with so much to give the world and when you step out and take action, not only will YOU benefit but of course so will those you love.

So as you can see here, there is no magic potion or spell. The things we want do not instantly manifest on our front lawns on a whim. You just have to step out and take them. All it requires is desire, strategy, some hard work (which moms are already familiar with) and the determination to see it through.

These 5 steps worked for me, and they’ll work for you too. Embrace them and you’ll be well on your way to creating the life you’ve always dreamed of.

Mona

the “Busy Mom Mentor”

ps if you are at all like I was …reach out and get some help digging for that gold inside you to help you remember what it is that you were once so passionate about.

In 30 min I can help you see clearly what it is you TRULY WANT to make happen in your life EVEN if you have forgotten, given up and are in a very bad mood about your life everyday!
Check out what’s brewing deep down inside you with my 30 minute rapid coaching discovery session  NOW

pps If you know of any other mom who would benefit from this information, I thank you, in advance for passing it on!

Namaste

What a waste of Energy

You can not control others………. Intellectually that makes perfect sense right? Then why is it that you keep trying?

There is a difference between trying to control or change others AND having your needs met.

The first is YOU trying to make those around you behave in a way that works for YOU in your life.

The latter is YOU asking speaking out, communicating what you need ( and most of those needs can be met by you!)

Even really simple things can drive you crazy like, having the toothpaste tube squeezed in the middle instead of  having it rolled up from the bottom, a new roll of TP put on instead of just leaving the empty cardboard tube and even driving yourself crazy because your kid did not do what you asked him/her for the 100th time. ARGHHH!

Well, just think about all the stress you are causing yourself and all the energy you are wasting by getting yourself so worked up inside. But what are you to do about it……how can YOU control them or get THEM to change (so YOU can feel better)? Wow, I am just tired trying to follow that train of thought.

Well, here are two things you can do right away:

1. Tell the person HOW you FEEL about it and ASK them if they can agree to do this for you or at least meet you half way. (now I know with kids it takes a little longer – BUT believe me, even with kids it is “human nature” to follow through with doing the task or request IF you give them your reason.) Has it ever worked to just “want” to do what you are told ( maybe only for fear of repercussions?) AND all the complaining in the world will NOT work…it will just make others turn a deaf ear or not want to be around you.

2.  Take a deep breath , ask yourself HOW truly important this is to you….can you relax and just let it go ( and if not WHY not?). Then let it go….It may still bother you, but if you can do this time and time again, before you know it, the more calm you are and things are getting done AND your calm energy will move around you and throughout your environment. Others will love being around you AND things WILL get done.

Lets face it …it is truly the small little things that build up that interfere with YOUR own peace of mind…..WHY are you letting that happen to you? Yes, YOU, are letting that happen to you and maybe even hindering some very loving relationships where that energy could be used for nurturing instead dismantling.

And if you really still feel you can not let go of the need to CONTROL……well how about funneling that energy to areas of your life and focus on things that are really in your control. YOU WILL feel better!  I guarantee it! ( but remember the key is to do these things – shift your focus – the mind can only hold one thought or focus at a time!)

Right now YOU are in charge of:

1. Your level of honesty.
2. How many times you smile today.
3. How often you say “thank you.”
4. What you spend your money on.

5. How you act on your feelings
6. Whether or not you give someone the benefit of the doubt.
7. Whether you listen or wait to talk.
8. When you walk away from a conversation.
9. The type of food you eat.
10. How much time you spend worrying.

11. How much exercise you get.
12. How many times you swear at others in traffic.
13. How often you think about your past.
14. How many negative articles you read or news you listen to.
15. The loving  attention you give to your spouse & kids when you see them.

16. How much you enjoy your kids right now.
17. Whether or not you communicate something that’s on your mind.
18. How you interpret situations.
19. How often you notice & appreciate small acts of kindness-they’re everywhere!

20. How deeply you breathe when you experience stress.
21. How many times you say “I love you.”

Food for thought isn’t it?

Just think of all the extra energy you will have when you stop trying to control and manage others and just manage yourself? Ahhh Bliss……


Can’t seem to STOP doing what is bringing you what you DON”T want in your life?

Maybe I can help you….Well in fact I KNOW I can help you.

Sometimes doesn’t it feel good to get an objective point of view…..One that can help you “see the forest for the trees” of should I say ” feel seen, heard and valued in YOUR world”?…Stop complaining - start attracting what you really want…give that all your attention, energy and focus.

You want more love….give more love (but not to someone if they are abusing  you), want more money, clean up your debt and start focusing on wealth and abundance, want more time….simplify your life and focus on what YOU TRULY WANT. STOP COMPLAINING about what you don’t want…cause guess what YOU WILL JUST GET MORE OF THAT.

Don’t know what you want ?  In 30 minutes with me ……YOU WILL KNOW.

Time to Discover what you Want to HAVE in your life. This is your movie…time to step into YOUR starring role!

….or you can just continue to get what you are getting now.  CHOOSE something NEW TODAY.

….and Remember  “When Moms Happy….Everyone’s Happy”


 

 

 

 

Mona

the “Busy Mom Mentor”

ps. if this messages today has helped you, even in the smallest of ways, please pass it on to others who are waiting to be inspired to create what they truly want in their lives.

~ How to say Thank you ~

What I want you to pay particular notice to when you are reading this is….which one of these ways to say thank you is the one that resonates with you the  most?  When you know what it is then let everyone know that this is HOW you like to be thanked….that this is the way that you most feel loved ( because guess what …everyone else is showing love and gratitude in the way they most want to feel and receive love……thus the problem.

YOU must know your way and then communicate that to those who you most want to receive love from!

 

Please read to what Britt Reints of  “In Pursuit of Happiness.net” writes…….

 

 5 love languages people use to communicate with each other. A “love language” is the type of communication a person tends to understand most easily, and may include:

 

 

  •  Words of Affirmation
  • Quality Time
  • Receiving Gifts
  • Acts of Service
  • Physical Touch

Our love language is the communication that we get, and it tends to be the one we use most often when we’re trying to send a message to someone else. Of course, if that person is more fluent in a different language, our true intent might get lost in translation.

Saying Thank You with Words of Affirmation

This is my native tongue. The more words you use, the more connected I feel. The best way to make someone like me feel appreciated is to open your mouth and say, “thank you.” You can also:

  • Write a letter or email
  • Send a text
  • Post to my Facebook wall

It doesn’t matter where you say it, but what you say will have a big impact. Say thank you and tell me why you’re thanking me – and you’ll make my day.

Saying Thank You with Quality Time

This is how my mom communicates. The best way to thank someone like her is to spend an afternoon hanging out on her deck with her. Other ways to show gratitude she’ll get include:

  • Making a phone call
  • Sharing a meal
  • Going for a drive or walk together

My mom is a cheap date, but letting her know she matters requires a little investment of time.

Saying Thank You with Gifts

I suspect my friend Megan speaks this language well, because she often sends little gifts to let me know I’m loved. Of course the most obvious way to show my gratitude is to return the favor, but that doesn’t mean saying thank you has to cost a fortune. Some inexpensive thank you gifts this week could be:

  • An ebook you know they’d enjoy
  • A song or movie rental on iTunes for a title that makes you think of them
  • A fridge magnet made from a picture of the two of you

It’s not the dollar amount that speaks the loudest, but the thought and effort.

Saying Thank You with Acts of Service

This is the language my mother-in-law speaks most easily. She does because she loves. What does she do? She cooks, she cleans, she babysits, and she picks up clothes in your size at garage sales. Saying thank you to someone who doesn’t say much can be tricky. You might try:

  • Cooking dinner
  • Doing a household chore
  • Offering up your work for free (logo design, photo editing, whatever it is you do and normally charge for)

They key for these non-verbal thank yous is to mix the act with a few words that make it clear that you are, in fact, grateful – especially if you’re unsaying thank you for something in particular.

Saying Thank You with Physical Touch

This is Jared’s language. The easiest way to turn his frown upside is to touch him – or let him touch me. Ahem. A few  family-friendly ways to thank someone like my husband might include:

  • A hug
  • A squeeze of the hand
  • A good handshake

A handshake might sound lame if you’re not a touchy person, but watch one exchanged between two men who have a lot of respect for one another and you’ll understand that it can mean more than, “hello, my name is…”

What’s your favorite way to say thank you? How are you planning to say thank you this week?  Please email me back and let me know!

 What would it be worth to you to discover the secrets to being SEEN, Heard and Valued in your World? Priceless!

Attract more time, money and love by being seen, heard and valued in your world ( 497.00 value) today 197.00 Click here to discover How

 

…and remember  When Moms Happy…Everyone’s Happy


Mona McClelland

the “Busy Mom Mentor”